/ashleyj/ - Ashley Jones

Discuss the world's funniest female comedienne, Ashley Jones.

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what if the occult alien reptilian jew power secret is just meth
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in certain high IQ countries you will be hard pressed to find anyone at all who hasn't at least tried meth.
Replies: >>10682
*or speed or another amphetamine
glad we've settled that meth is good in moderation
up for awareness
meth bump... I'm 13 and I think meth is based debate me libtards

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I want to remove his vocal cords.

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Third in a series of EROTIC TALES starring  the alluring and captivating world renowned comedienne, Ashley Jones.

Disclaimer: EROTIC TALES is a seperate entity and is not associated with JONES TOWN PRODUCTIONS or its affiliates.

                     --------- A FRUITFUL EXPERIENCE -----------

I arrived home, my partner and I have been working on finishing a basement. Customer wants a man cave. He said that it will be a good place to escape from his wife. He has some cool pin ball machines and neon bar memorabilia. As I was pulling into my driveway I glanced at the house next door to see if she was home but I couldn't tell for sure. Maybe she was at a garage sale or second hand store.

I put the coffee on and jumped in the shower. After the shower I was about to pour myself a cup of fresh made coffee when I heard a gentle unobtrusive knock on the door. I could tell by the polite knock that it was her. I opened the door and it was. Why does my heart BPM go from 45 to 90 whenever I first see her?  She stood there with a CO2 tank in one hand and a regulator and a clear plastic bag of fruit in the other hand. She said "HI" and I invited her in.

She said that she couldn't attach her tank to the regulator. I took a look and saw the problem. She needed a threaded reducer fitting. We went into the garage and rooted through my hardware drawer and found exactly what she needed. I sealed the threads with some teflon tape, installed the fitting and it was good to go. She thanked me and we went back into the house.

I asked her that as long as she was here would she like to stay for dinner. She said, "Seabee, you know I'm a vegan." I replied in the affirmative and told her that I downloaded a vegan recipe that I thought she might like and on the way home from work I stopped at the market and picked up the necessary ingredients. She seemed impressed with my thoughtfulness and asked about the recipe. I told her that it was vegan lasagna. She licked her sweet lips and asked if I would be eating the same. I told her that I had made a big pot of chilli. It would have been vegan except for the chop meat that I added.

I gave the Ash the downloaded recipe and got the ingredients from the fridge. She spread the ingredients on the kitchen counter and set the oven to pre heat it and I took some chill out of the big pot to heat up a little later. I poured myself a cup of coffee and sat in the dining room to keep her company while she was prepping her lasagna in the kitchen.
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>To keep me out of trouble with the assistant principal, she had me sit by her in class and she was genuinely disappointed with me not doing my assignments but still passed me
> She caught me looking up porn on a laptop and didn't make a fuss about it
>I once walked in on her changing in her classroom after school

Passing you whilst you never did your assignments barbecues you were watching pornographic material and you walked in on her changing?!?!? 
i have bad news for you anon. You have autism and could have fucked your 8th grade English teacher and could have lived the dream!... Either that or she recognized your brilliant mind and wanted you to go onto bigger and brighter things like shitposting on img boards

You went to a Catholic high school and never got molested?!?! Youre unironically lucky, me? not so much...
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I had gym class once a week and after gym class you had to take a shower. After the shower you couldn't just remove a towel from the shelf, no. The two gym teachers handed out the towels so they could watch our young nubile bodies.
She knew I was smarter than everyone else she taught and she probably liked that I was a bad boy. I have mentioned here before that I was T.J. Detweiler in middle school. When she had caught me looking up porn in class, we had borrowed those laptops from the school library to do a project and I had found a way to circumvent the internet filter, Bess. Here's an article on Bess if you don't know what it is. https://ncac.org/resource/internet-filters#BESS

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tahiti where are you desu
tahiti どこにいますか
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fuuuck we cant have anything nice
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Herró me so sorry foru not posting ratery. I had very bad thing happen.
Tahiti was having fun vacation. ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

Tahiti met nice girru. ( • )( • ) ԅ(‾⌣‾ԅ)

Tahiti then wake up naked behind 7-Ereven in makati city with arru money storen and strange rash. (╬⓪益⓪)

Itsu oku now thou. I fry tū new vacation destination. But if you see girru in pictsure stay awey!! very bad!!

Make memories one adventure at a time.
Who You?: I am Tahiti. I rove vacation! 🗿🍹
<Ristening to: CAPSULE - ギヴ・ミー・ア・ライド
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horry shet!!
Wwwww you may not be aware of this but that was actually a grey alien that abducted you
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>Tahiti then wake up naked behind 7-Ereven in makati city with arru money storen and strange rash.
Was it something like this?

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I am a white supremacist who is seeking a close personal relationship. Whites are superior in everything, and we know that women are deemed inferior by the bible. Thus, to maximize superiority, I am seeking an intimate relationship with the most supreme, AKA a white male.

Here's what you need to know. My favorite food? Of course I like a supreme pizza... extra sausage ;) with white sauce. maybe you can give me your white sauce? My favorite wrestler is Hulk Hogan (HH).

I am a white power bottom, of course. And yes, I will clean out my asshole. I want it to look good for you.

Will we secure our future together? <3
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No, he ran away after I proved him wrong. The Moron also thought I was Asian. He couldn’t find the echo chamber here that’s for sure.
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Worst people in the entire fucking history of planet earth = Ahrimanists, Molochites, Mammonists:

2.anglos including americans and irish
3.abos and niggers
5.chinks japs and gooks

Best people = Ahura Mazdaites, creators of the Vedas, Zoroastrianotypes:

All other pink-nippled people

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This kctyre post was brought to you by Dominik "kcroat" Bertovic
Another interracial thread???


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What would you do if you had an infinite amount of money?
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probably force her to eat papa john's pizzas until she is fat af then have her sit on my face and suffocate me to death

just being honest is all
Replies: >>10171
you forgot to talk about her blowing farts into your mouth as your only source as air
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>>10062 (OP) 
>>10062 (OP) 
pretty sure the OP image is fake. If I had infinite money I would make it a reality. everyone has a price
>>10062 (OP) 
What a shame about her natural titties. She could have been on 100% Natural Wonders directed by Harry Palm

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Oh it would be so terrible if you went to make a post on this cool new imageboard.
Please definitely don't do so @ https://omegachan.cc/
Tor: http://omegch4qojmuqfn5rdspxe6kxo6aa3zkal7nfb6hkybadn3yvftow6yd.onion/
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We don't have to imagine what Ashley's legs look like, just see those beauties in Derricks Birthday video. But what about her breasts? Post a pic of what you imagine her breasts look like. Keep in mind that the Ash is no stranger to the occasional padding to achieve a dramatic effect. So post what you imagine her breasts to be au naturel. Here's my entry. And Ash, if you like you can select the winner.
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>Even on the old older ashleyj endchan board, i still made friends and had good times and laughs.
>and since she has come back, I made even more friends and have had even more laughs.
>I like coming here and goofing around with my fellow retards, I like the cytube chat/premiers, I like reading the comments people leave on her videos, etc etc

There are a few genres of gay porn, featuring men. There are AI models to create yuri and yao but even ordinary ai models can make it.

I don't think you will learn how to use a sextant this way, but you might learn some knots creating shibari / kinbaku
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>I appreciate your optimism, I really do
It isn't just something theoretical for me. I feel it. I don't know when the last time was that you wanted to try and chase art, to create, and feel there was an idea you wanted to capture and bring into the world, and feel driven to make. 

I feel it. It is like becoming awake.
Ai art isnt art its more like engineering, 
Like you guiding a machine with prompts to get it churn out a response to your liking. Though its certainly capable of some impress results visually, it ultimately lacks "soul".

There is also the more sinister element of Ai.
People are already gullible from just reading a headline. Now that we have rapidly improving tech to produce realistic deepfakes, the potential to cause more social divide and make people believe anything is only going to get worse.
I understand there is apparently software to detect if something was Ai generated, hopefully that can keep up with the pace that Ai is developing.
Even if it does though, will people believe if something was declared deepfaked anyways? The line between knowing whats real and what isnt is going to get blurrier and blurrier and with todays social and political climate, I think it spells nothing but bad news ahead.
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>I understand there is apparently software to detect if something was Ai generated
There is, but it's 100% garbage across the board, and I suspect it will be almost impossible to ever tell whether something is AI generated with complete certainty. This is true for both pictures and text. I've tried them myself, the results are borderline random.
When GPT was first in the headlines a bunch of boomer professors scrambled to find "AI detection" tools and shitloads of college age kids who had legitimately written their papers flocked to the internet saying how they got into trouble, were getting flunked from their classes, etc. (They couldn't ALL have been lying and at a cursory glance I found dozens of reports like this).

>Even if it does though, will people believe if something was declared deepfaked anyways? The line between knowing whats real and what isnt is going to get blurrier and blurrier and with todays social and political climate, I think it spells nothing but bad news ahead.
I hate to say it but I agree
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yeah thats what i feared. The ability to easily fake stuff exponentially outpaces the ability to disprove it.
Even if you can prove a AI video.audio deepfake is real or fake, people are already fucking stupid RE: Covid conspiracies but we will very soon have the ability to create super believable bullshit via artificial intelligence???? RIP

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While I am online, I like to take the chance to detox with some good internet radio. 

Do you know any good radio sites? To start the ball rolling, here is a station I enjoy: Speak Free Radio


You can go into e.g. VLC and put the following link there:

Media-->Open Network Stream-->Network:  https://stream.speakfreeradio.com/listen/sfr_stream/radio.aac48

There are some great shows on there. Here is one on right now, archived on LBRY. It is about South Africa and is fascinating:

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I've downloaded music off youtube for as long as I can remember but for the most part never had an account. The suggestions have never been that good, most of the time to find something obscure you have to find an album you already like then search through the uploader's account for another album, then repeat with another channel. When I had an account I'd eventually get obscure suggestions that way but now the suggestions seem to be tied to whatever the current session is, that also goes for invidious instances(which are great for downloading audio). I actually found your videos from youtube suggestions back when I had an account though lol, which is kind of worrying knowing the data google must have been collecting, I wonder what data they got from you? You even had a phone back then. Also I use vlc all the time, would be cool for some skins, the desktop themes were nice
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anon.fm is the radio that I used to listen to a lot. Basically, this radio was founded by the regular users of the russian imageboards at the end of the 2000s, and still contains the spirit of those times. At one time there were many unique cool moments happens on the radio, but now I listen to it very rarely, because over the past 7 years several factors have appeared that make me not want to listen to this radio. But I still love this radio, and New Year's broadcasts of <<Radio Anonymous>> are my favorite way to celebrate the new year.
And, I also liked the Armitage's Dimension radio, but it seems to have ceased to exist.
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>Armitage's Dimension
 lmao just kidding, i have adblockers so I literally get no ads

also it doenst always suggest videos with tons of views either, particularly when its comes to music
For example it recommended me this little gem with only 90 views and 20subscribers


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>>10066 (OP) 
HERRO!!!! ─=≡Σʕっ•ᴥ•ʔっ
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Oh no i forgottó signatsure desu here it isu!!

i was justó so excitedó someone make this threadu abouto me!!!!! (〜^∇^)〜

Seek the unknown, and let it change you.
Who You?: I am Tahiti. I rove vacation! 🗿🍹
<Ristening to: SAWA『Mr.Brown』PV FullVer.(2013.08.28Released!!)
<Rink: https://vid.puffyan.us/watch?v=qYWYIKReHH0 🎵🕺
>Location: Martinique 🌏✈️
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I brought the candy!!
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Such a stupid stereotype of Minor Attracted Persons. In reality they look more like picrel.
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Wrong. They look like this.

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