/ashleyj/ - Ashley Jones

Discuss the world's funniest female comedienne, Ashley Jones.


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(Based on a true story) One day, asking a stranger for a quick favor turns into a 90-minute hellscape fiasco.
https://videos.icum.to/w/rnfkwZ5sxuLLhvsWLw7AgE
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>>15021
Amazing depiction anon, that's pretty much exactly how I imagine the behind the scenes of the greenscreen videos would look.

Instead of the dog gate fence thing, could it be part of the green screen apparatus itself? like one of these clips?

My other theory is that it's Ashley's scary lesbian "girl"friend
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>>15013

I spoke to him and he told me that he was very busy building a bunker for himself and his family.
Desu.
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>>15030
>his famiry
Are you talking about the million little girls he produced with Ashley in his fanfiction >>>9241
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>>15034

No. I was referring to his grandfather, mom, dad and siblings.
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>>15016
it does look a bit like Bandit, colour and shape wise there is a resemblance. Speaking of fitting, perhaps its a photo of Bandit showing off his geode collecting skills?

>>15021
*notices your big ass*
Excellent theory and you might be right, theres also a bit of something that appears at the same time the mysterious object does. It is down near the bottom of the glass or see grey-thing.gif for more information.
Nice drawing of Antiques Guy too heh


I just cant get over the timing of when it appears. Maybe its just a coincidence that it enters the video just before Antiques Guy answers the question he posed to the cute midget cosplaying as David Cassidy, that question being "do you know what this is?"
And the movement is to smooth as well, like its an object in a video editor thats been motioned/moved with keyframing.
That plus the timing of this imo means it has to be a secret answer of some kind.

As for what this mystery object might be, I was non-sexuually thinking about Ambatukam and his asshole, when it reminded of something else that shit comes out of... Ashley's mouth.

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post other signs of the coming end of the world. 

>https://twitter.com/SnoopDogg/status/1725196796618817785
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>>15059 (OP) 
He quit smoking but I'm sure he will continue taking edibles.
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Repent.
>>15060
true

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Next up is item No 15,000 titled "Willy's Last Ride" by the artist known as Chester.

The bidding starts at $1.25...
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>>15000 (OP) 
Antiques Guy being the only one not vomiting is a nice touch. Congratulations on this lovely get. What a nice milestone. We moved over from endchan, what, like 10,000 posts ago?

I look forward to shitposting with you gentlemen for many fruitful years to come.
Imagine the smell
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>>15014
bro I would deepsniff willy's butthole in a heartbeat
>>15000 (OP) 
BBBBBBBBBRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
snnnnniiiiiiffffffffffff...oh yes my dear....sssnnnnnnnnnnnniiiiiiiiffffffff....quite pungent indeed...is that....dare I say....sssssssnniff...eggs I smell?......sniff sniff....hmmm...yes...quite so my darling....sniff....quite pungent eggs yes very much so .....ssssssssssssssnnnnnnnnnnnnnnniiiiiiiffffff....ah yes...and also....a hint of....sniff....cheese.....quite wet my dear....sniff...but oh yes...this will do nicely....sniff.....please my dear....another if you please....nice a big now....
BBBBBBRRRRRRRAAAAAAAPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPFFFFFF
Oh yes...very good!....very sloppy and wet my dear....hmmmmm...is that a drop of nugget I see on the rim?...hmmmm.....let me.....let me just have a little taste before the sniff my darling.......hmmmmm....hmm..yes....that is a delicate bit of chocolate my dear....ah yes....let me guess...curry for dinner?....oh quite right I am....aren't I?....ok....time for sniff.....sssssnnnnnnniiiiiiiiffffffff.....hmmm...hhhmmmmm I see...yes....yes indeed as well curry......hmmm....that fragrance is quite noticeable....yes.....onion and garlic chutney I take it my dear?.....hmmmmm....yes quite.....
BBBBBBRRRRRRRRPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTT
Oh I was not expecting that…that little gust my dear….you caught me off guard…yes…so gentle it was though…hmmmm…let me taste this little one…jus
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WUT.

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The living text wall answers your questions.

>2004 webcam
Not all of us enjoy the "perks" of the modern internet, such as having 4k livestreamed anal inspections. Enjoy your authentic old school Q and A video :3

https://videos.icum.to/w/jBPocH2A7EdMm1D9CrRRC4
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>>14908

>year ago.
I was hoping you would respond in a video in 8 - 9 years
>I masturbated at 5. 
6 for me, it was the indian chapter in the primary school history book, there where pornographic tantra sculptures, couldn't even jeez, experienced multiple orgasms.
>I appreciate the female form physically/sexually more than the male form
Immaculate taste
>Picrelated
Looks shopped, i can tell by the pixels
>Lots, lots, lots of food
like this? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QsR02U5qyco
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>>14908
>penises themselves visually do nothing
Sexual organs are kinda gross, i don't think you are supposed to look at them tbh seems like a porn induced thing
>>14968
>couldn't even jeez, experienced multiple orgasms.
For me, it was the jacuzzi jets at the public outdoor pool at my grandparent's gated community. shit was unbelievably cash
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>>14978
its even better at public pools so you get to stare at girls in swimsuits, plus the added thrill of doing it in public
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>>14979
It's even better at public schools

What you're not allowed to see

https://www.youtube.com/@TheShepherdsChapel/playlists

https://www.youtube.com/@MARK13RECORDS/videos
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>>14844 (OP) 
I used to watch the Shepherd's Chapel when my satellite dish was up and running. The program was a good bible study. I learned a lot from watching the program. I think Dennis Murray took over from his father, Arnold Murray.
>>14845
i cant read what is this?
>>14844 (OP) 
i cant read what is this?
>>14844 (OP) 
i can read but what is this?
>>14844 (OP) 
>What you're not allowed to see
>it's on youtube
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Dear Ashley Jones,

If you hate trannies so much, then why do you relentlessly goon to gay porn all day and dream about hardcore gay sex every night?
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>>14738
nah thats you
ANSWER THE QUESTION ASHLEY
EXPLAIN YOURSELF ASHLEY JONES
ELABORATE, ASHLEY
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ITT we gripe about regrets we have.

>I will never date a 12 year old Ashley
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>>12903
tell me about it... lets just say she emulated her infamous brown wood wall paneling except without the wood paneling...
So I went to one of those speed date thingos...
At one point during the day (they are hosted during the daytime which in all honesty makes it low key kinda depressing) I got matched with the host of the event Ashley Jones.
things were going really well between us. so well in fact I suspected she wanted the D 
however, we were in the midst of a deep discussion regarding the abstract social commentary about the morality of marijuana use and its impact on society in the 2009 avant-garde film "Sex Pot" starring Sam Cassel and directed by Eric ForsBERG.
When I pulled out my brand new Google Pixel 7 Pro to look something up and holy shit bros... did she blow a fucking gasket!
She started ranting and raving about how Google partners with the government to promote agendas and how they favour corporate websites and they destroyed the "fun" of the internet (she air quoted the "fun" btw... SUPER cringe, yikes even). Plus something about SEO?

At one point she was so irate that she accidentally let rip a massive fart. 
This didnt stop her however, in fact it seemed to fuel her anger even more!

If that wasn't already embarrassing enough, she ended her rant by throwing the free soda water we all got (which was yellow and had this strange taste btw) in my face and declaring at the top of her lungs "MAYBE YOU SHOULD STICK THAT GOOGLE PIXEL PHONE UP YOUR ASSHOLE SO IT CAN MAP THE WALLS OF YOUR COLON AND THAT WAY GOOGLE CAN KNOW HOW TO FUCK YOU EVEN BETTER"

Needless to say, this whole thing left me super embarrassed and I had run out and didnt go back.
I never ended up paying my entry fee for the event though, so jokes on her. I got the last laugh.

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>>13170
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>>13173
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Omegle got shutdown after 14 years...
https://www.ndtv.com/world-news/omegle-popular-video-chat-site-shuts-down-after-14-years-4559885

>I regret never going on it, finding and then cooming to Ashley back in the day

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                    COUNTDOWN TO HALLOWEEN

https://www.youtube.com/live/xY0sS_UZYos
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>>14580
Please stop posting this tranny
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>>14568
Classic Mode
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>>14585

I can't resist her charms
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Make the board the color of ice 'cause you're so cool.
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                      OR

https://youtu.be/ySb1f9zWJkQ

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Hello welcome to GETS, what can I GET you?

Yes hi, I would like a GET please.

Fine.... which number would you like?

I'll take 13000 thank you

Fine... would you like any (You)'s with that?

Yes please.

Fine... That will be.... umm hold on.... that will be $8.69

I think you mean $10.98
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>>14437
Sorry, I can't regale you with tales of unbridled sex with Afghan women because:

1)   Islamic culture forbids unmarried Afghan women to partake in sex as well as married women other than with their husband. It's ingrained in them. It's extremely rare but if it happens and the woman is found out she will probably be stoned to death.

2) It's illegal for a serviceman to be intimate with the locals and the serviceman could face a few years in the brig.

3) Afghan women didn't do it for me, 2/10 on a good day. They're very far from being Ashley tier to name just one

4)  Even if I was horny enough and knew I could get away with it I'd be too tired. Up at 05:00 travel to the job site and work 'till 17:30, back to the base camp, dinner then fill sand bags to replace damaged sand bags around base camp fortifications, then base camp perimeter security duty to make sure no Taliban psychos try an incursion into the camp. Security duty lasted "till the next morning but at least if you pulled security duty you got to go back to bed after breakfast and sleep "till around noon and then go back to work.

   Like the saying goes, "It's not just a job, it's an adventure."     Heh, heh
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>>14440
Sure, stable girls are a staple of our society.
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>>14445
this is my favourite staple girl 🤣🤣🤣
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>>14450

Heh. heh, then I guess we won't need one of these
>>14450
The post that saved /ashleyj/

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https://www.youtube.com/embed/hc4gc4RWhH0
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>>14256
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>>10578 (OP) 
That's not Ashley with Sam, it's this girl. Apparently, they both have a thing for Egg Foo Young.
https://endchan.org/agatha2/res/24139.html
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reminder that ash wants to fuck this thing
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>>14295
>>14277
webp is evil.

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