/ashleyj/ - Ashley Jones

Discuss the world's funniest female comedienne, Ashley Jones.


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No.27610
icum.to.png
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This thread is to discuss Ashley's website, https://icum.to/

As you're no doubt aware, you can spend hours reading and exploring her html/css rat's nest. Talk about your findings, discuss Ashley's written content, and share the bizarre easter eggs you've come across (there are several).
Replies: >>27667
No.27611
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I'd like to open the discussion by examining Ashley's "MY LAWS IF I WROTE LAWS" page, which can be found at: https://icum.to/dogvids/

On the page, she says,
>Back to beastiality, I think you should be able to have sex with certain animals. Obviously, it would be unethical to have sex with a bird. You're going to kill that thing with your dong. But most states would rather you do that than have sex with a 17 year old. Anyways, birds are out of the question. When talking about beastiality, we need to take into consideration the height and weight of you, and the height and weight of the animal. The bigger the animal, the more ethical it is to have sex with them. Cats are out, don't have sex with them. They're way too small and too innocent to have sex; you're going to hurt them. Dogs are a tough one. Don't try to tell me you can have sex with a toy poodle, it's not gonna happen in my world. Again, you're gonna hurt them. I think once we start getting to labrador sized animals, you MIGHT be okay. But I just can't accept that it's okay to have sex with your dog, so I still wouldn't allow it in my world. However, you would be allowed to have sex with a horse.

Interestingly enough, I think the impossibly based John McAfee would have agreed with her (picrel). Hell, I think *I* agree with both of them. McAfee makes a very solid point here, and Ashley seems to have come to the same conclusion.

One of my dream "podcasts" would be to listen to AJ and JM talk about life, the universe, and everything, totally uncensored, for at least 5 hours. Now that would be entertainment. John and his black wife would probably convince Ashley to try cocaine and then get her to have a disgusting, sweaty threesome.
Replies: >>27612 >>27661
No.27612
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>>27611
>in my world. However, you would be allowed to have sex with a horse.
She's just trying to normalize her horse fetish. Clearly she doesn't live in New Mexico or West Virginia.
https://worldpopulationreview.com/state-rankings/beastiality-legal-states
Replies: >>27613 >>27614
No.27613
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>>27612
wow based I know where my next vacation's gonna be
No.27614
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>>27612
>https://worldpopulationreview.com/state-rankings/beastiality-legal-states
>Because it is very difficult to tell if an animal is giving consent [...]
lol no
Replies: >>27645
No.27620 
YouTube links no longer work on here for some reason.
Replies: >>27631
No.27631 
>>27620
see
>>27619
>>27627
>>27630
based mommy Ashley is forcing you NPCs to use privacy respecting frontends
Replies: >>27634
No.27634 
>>27631
She's doing it for herself.
Replies: >>27638
No.27638 
>>27634
No, you're just proud of being kpop cattle. I'm 100% in support of this change because I never click on the youtube or twitter links people post. If I want to see what someone has posted I have to manually edit the link to a privacy frontend and it's pain in the ass. It's extra frustrating when the link is something stupid. Sorry that you're upset Ashley is literally forcing you to take the globohomo cock out of your mouth.
Replies: >>27640
No.27640 
>>27638
Everything you said has nothing to do with me. You just assumed a whole lot of shit based on nothing. You're probably one of those schizos you all like to talk about. You seem like a miserable person and you have my pity. If it's extra frustrating for you then it's probably frustrating for her as well. so she is doing it for herself. You're not special enough for her to even care.
Replies: >>27641 >>27643
No.27641 
>>27640
Kill yourself
Replies: >>27644
## Board Owner No.27643
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>>27640
>she is doing it for herself
>wanting youtube and elon musk to take your stool sample just because you clicked a link
Not in MY house.
No.27644 
>>27641
Kill yourself? That's the dumbest shit ever. Is that supposed to evoke some kind of response out of someone? How about you take your chill pills.
No.27645 
>>27614
Can we PLEASE get back on topic...thank you.
"Ahem"
So, What's the general consensus on sex with elephants. Is bigger neccessary better?
Replies: >>27646
No.27646
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The change is not really that big of a deal is it? I say this as someone that uses Youtube. 
Instead of clicking the link and getting a postage stamp sized embed, you now have it open in a new tab.
the only downside is previously by clicking the embed you would get the thumbnail, so you got a small idea of what the video was about. Now users should probably post something about what the video is about instead of just dropping only the link

For example, posting a song in the music thread. Users should probably post the Band and track name ie "My Chemical Romance - Our Lady of Sorrows"

>>27645
Whatever you do, just dont stick your head up their butthole. I remember some poor bastard did that and couldnt get his head out and ended up suffocating to death.
if youre going to do it, make sure you go in leg first for an easier exit strategy like this guy did.
Replies: >>27649 >>27654 >>27656
No.27649 
>>27646
>Now users should probably post something about what the video is about instead of just dropping only the link

Good. Now the posts will be much more distinct from one another.
Replies: >>27657
No.27654 
>>27646
>Now users should probably post something about what the video is about instead of just dropping only the link
I post pics of album covers/artists in the music thread since it's easier to find when scrolling through hundreds of posts.
Replies: >>27655 >>27657
No.27655 
>>27654
This is always nice. Another benefit of invidious is that it gives you a listen only option, which makes loading much faster since you're only streaming the audio. You can tack &listen=1 onto the end of your URL to enable this by default.
No.27656 
>>27646
>The change is not really that big of a deal is it? I say this as someone that uses Youtube. 
you're right, it's no big deal. if for whatever reason you want to continue using youtube you can just click "watch on youtube" (but I personally don't see the point, the video will be the exact same just without loading youtube's bullshit)
Replies: >>27658
No.27657 
>>27649
Exactly. I always thought the music thread would be better if people wrote something about the music/song instead of just posting a link. Or like >>27654 says, posting a picture of the artist with a link.
Replies: >>27659
No.27658
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>>27656
forgot screenshot
No.27659
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>>27657
Jon Korn - Gettin' Korny Wit it
https://invidious.privacyredirect.com/watch?v=AGZYB23N4-o
No.27661 
>>27611
just like most things in life, it's okay when a woman does it. it's wrong if a man tries to have sex with a dog but it's okay when a woman eventually does it.
Replies: >>27662 >>27663 >>27666
No.27662 
>>27661
>woman spread legs
>dog decides to put its dick in her
>feels good

>man puts his penis in dog
>penis is significantly girthier and longer than a dogs dick
>probably hurts the female dogs pusspuss
No biggie. He just has to find a bigger animal to fuck that his dick wont hurt. Try a dolphin.
No.27663 
>>27661
nigga my dog humps my leg and my pillows. what difference does it make if he decides to hump white trash pussy?
No.27666 
>>27661
Woman's vagina = does not hurt animal
Male's penis = possibly hurts animal
No.27667 
>>27610 (OP) 
Oh gosh, the code is horrible!

Throw it all on git and get ;) the simps to fix it for you.

I honestly might...
Replies: >>27668
## Board Owner No.27668
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>>27667
Can't fix perfection.
Replies: >>27671 >>27674
No.27671 
>>27668
I said code, you posted a picture of the site.

Honestly Ashley, how do you even manage it?
Replies: >>27672
No.27672 
>>27671
bro what the fuck do you think the code outputs? a website
Replies: >>27676
No.27674 
>>27668
kek good keep filtering phonefags
No.27676 
>>27672
But I talked about the code not the website

Fucking retard
Replies: >>27677
No.27677 
>>27676
You need to be more clear, mouthbreather. Are you trying to say her HTML is messy?

P.S. HTML is a markup language and only huge fucking normie retards would call it "code" or refer to writing html as "programming"
Replies: >>27679 >>27684
No.27679 
>>27677
"Oh gosh, the code is horrible!"
How could I've been more clear? Dumb fuck
Replies: >>27682
No.27682 
>>27679
>"gosh golly gee whiz ash, your CODE is bad!"
>based ashley posts a screenshot of her website to show that it doesn't render properly in mobile resolutions
>ummm ackshually I said the code not the website >:-)
>nobody understands what the fuck you're talking about since HTML isn't code and the screenshot is a result of the html "code"
>you continue to sperg out and repeat yourself like a boomer retard
Are you actually retarded or a troll? If Ashley gave a fuck about messy HTML she could run it through an HTML linter like anyone else, no git simps necessary.
No.27684 
>>27677
writing HTML is not programming but HTML text may be called code, HTML is a computer language, though not programming language (in a strict sense anyway, it could be called a programming language under a more loose definition, see for example the "text" esolang)
Replies: >>27685 >>27689
No.27685 
>>27684
I'd just ignore the other guy at this point
Replies: >>27686
No.27686 
>>27685
kek well it has to be two people because someone other than me is also calling you retarded
No.27689 
>>27684
you're not wrong but imho there's a difference between "bad" code and "messy" code. I assume the anon is saying her html is messy, because what else could he mean? the site works and the html documents render fine in any browser. Doesn't seem "horrible" to me. and Yes I know there's a school of thought that would say "good code is clean code" etc but, again, html may colloquially be referred to as code but in reality it isn't, at least not in the same sense that scheme or C# or even python scripting is "code." we're also talking about a hobbyist website here, not a mission critical innovative web 9.0 soydev webapp blockchain fintech whatever buzzword bullshit thing.
No.27690 
shut the fuck up nerd
No.27693 
https://validator.w3.org/nu/?doc=https%3A%2F%2Ficum.to%2F
59 errors, site is browsable in lynx tho
fun fact: I prefer lynx now because all the animated images are actually making my old thinkpad catch fire (almost literally)
Replies: >>27696
## Board Owner No.27696
already-bought-my-tickets.webm
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>>27693
The vast majority of these aren't errors. These are mostly suggestions (even starting with #1).
>The character encoding was not declared. 
This isn't really an error, it's a meaningless suggestion that doesn't affect anything in my use case. Nobody needs to follow this for a basic html page.

An overwhelming amount of these "errors" are simply suggesting using an alt tag in an image tag, which by no means is an error and basically sucks the penis of Google for better SEO. 17 of these "errors" in total.

The other majority of the "errors" are saying certain tags like <center> or <font> are obsolete, which is obviously not the case if you look at my website. These tags work and are not obsolete. 13 of these "errors" in total.

Then the probably other 25 "errors" is w3schools saying you can't use a percentage for determining height or width, which isn't true. If you look at my website, using % for width and height does work. Not sure why something that works perfectly as intended is considered an error. 18 of these "errors" in total.

There are a few that "violates nesting rules", which basically means you mix the order of the opening and closing tags, but it doesn't really impact anything. It's just not pretty and also not an error. 5 of these "errors" total.

<All the above equals 54 complaints/suggestions that aren't errors.

The only actual "errors" might be #18 and #57 where I put a closing </p> and </a> tag when there wasn't a starting <p> or <a> tag. Given my schizo page, who can blame me? I'm not using a fancy text editor that catches extra tags or automatically "help me". I hand write my HTML in a notebook, scan the pages, then OCR them.
Replies: >>27712 >>27723 >>27738
No.27697
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Elaine: There are so many errors on your website! What are you thinking?
Puddy: What do you mean? Looks fine to me.
Elaine: You're telling me you're OK with not having alt tags? It doesn't bother you that you forgot to set the character encoding to UTF-8?
Puddy: Yeah, that's right.
No.27698 
ITT we write Ashley a html page
Replies: >>27702
No.27702 
>>27698
<html>
  <body>
  <blink>kpop fans tongue my
Replies: >>27712
No.27712 
>>27696
I think 59 is just where it stops counting, fix these and you'll get like 1000 more maybe <>_<> ye fuck obsolete warnings, obsolete in fact means better tested and oldschool cool, however non-matching tags can fuck up tinier browsers, important to fix

>>27702
> <html><body>
you already fucked up
Replies: >>27713
No.27713
holdon.jpg
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>>27712
>you already fucked up
or no, I see they made head optional in HTML5 sowwy, maybe I'm the retard
Replies: >>27714
No.27714
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>>27713
It is exceedingly rare for a tubsister to admit when xir was wrong. We're evolving.
No.27723 
>>27696
>already-bought-my-tickets.webm
>safe spaces
>horses
>FUCKING LOOL!!!
Remember to post your videos after your Queendom retreat.
No.27736 
if you dont know, then kill yourself, however if you managed to survive the fall and browsed her website long enough before the agonizing pain kicks in... then you might have discovered a secret easter egg.
If can answer the question/s??? correctly and follow the instructions... you can win a prize
No.27738 
>>27696
W3schools owes this woman an apology
No.27891
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Just to get this discussion back on track, do you really think this should be illegal? Why do you want the government to legislate a natural, loving relationship like this one? It's clearly consensual.
Replies: >>27892 >>27893
No.27892
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>>27891
Dogs just want to have fun
No.27893 
>>27891
built for it
No.28331 
Ashlie reupload your older vids from jpop fantube/bitchute archive to peertubie? They're good and I don't wanna cum to jpop fantube and can't comment on it <>_<>
No.28367 
also website doesn't work in froge website simplifier ;_;
http://frogfind.com/read.php?a=https%3A%2F%2Ficum.to
Replies: >>28368
No.28368
soy.jpg
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>>28367
>some obnoxious apple fan youtuber's abandoned pet project doesn't work
wow_its_fucking_nothing.jpeg
why would you use this lesbian's le vintage monstrosity and not literally any text browser instead is beyond me
Replies: >>28372
No.28372 
>>28368
it works for other sites
>why would you use this lesbian's le vintage monstrosity
for example it makes sites accessible through HTTP instead of shitty bloated HTTPS that only works on capitalist machines, that alone is enought for me, but it also just strips other bullshit from the site without downloading it, good for low bandwidth or data limits
Replies: >>28374
No.28374 
>>28372
>cryptographic overhead
>bloat
widespread use of HTTPS is one of the only somewhat good things about the modern internet
Replies: >>28379
No.28379
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>>28374
sir you have been brainwashed
Replies: >>28381 >>28384
No.28381
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>>28379
Please elaborate
No.28384 
>>28379
saar, do not redeem the certificate. SIR! SIR!
No.28529 
Guys! Ashley's social media websites are just one big experiment, don't fall for it! Nothing about her is real, she's just experimenting!
Replies: >>28530
No.28530 
>>28529
Is that what you told your girlfriend about that one time in college, that you were just experimenting. Have you even told her about Ashley yet?
Replies: >>28533
No.28533 
>>28530
That one time I fucked my girlfriend was real. I cummed inside her and she was creampied by me. Fr fr on god no cap.

Ashley is just a fictional character in your mind.
Replies: >>28535
No.28535 
>>28533
Ashley isn't real, huh? Well, then, what do you have to say about this?
https://gizmoxxx.com/vid/ph5ecca2a15f7c212
No.28764 
Just like my asshole, the Void Thread is completely full! Admin, please make a new Void Thread so we can continue discussing important topics such as bug swapping, glory holes and rollerblading. Thanks, sweety!~ <3
No.28887 
you should make a new channel for your skits and call it "ashley.jokes"
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