/ashleyj/ - Ashley Jones

Discuss the world's funniest female comedienne, Ashley Jones.


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A thread dedicated to those who enjoy any literary works ranging from various genres and categories can be posted and discussed here.
Replies: >>4631 >>4633
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>>4630
This novel depicts a violent revolution in the United States which leads to the overthrow of the Federal Government and a race war which leads to the extermination of non whites. All groups opposed by the novel's protagonist, Earl Turner, including Jews, non whites, liberals and politians are murdered en masse.

I lent my copy to someone and never got it back and now the novel is hard to find and what cost me a few bucks a few years age now costs thirty bucks on line. It's a good read though. I guess I'll bite the bullet and order another copy.
what the fuck seabees is based??
>>4630
That’s just talking bout books. A proper book club would be ashley picks a book and we all ready x amount of pages a week and discuss it on the weekend.
Replies: >>4636
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>>4631
When will Ashley do the Ethnic Cleansing let's play?
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>>4631
Sounds like a nice book, the follow up called 'The Hunter' is also intriguing. That's unfortunate that you never got your copy back, I never lend out anything rare/valuable to people, even if they're close friends or family. I'll keep an eye out for those two novels.
Replies: >>4638
>>4633
True, I just thought it sounded cute. I'll edit the title whenever I get around to it. I was unaware that Ashley can read now, she is more than welcome to post any children's books she finds at her local thrift store.
Replies: >>4642
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>>4635
When you get a chance could you give a quick synopsis regarding The Hunter, I might order it when I order The Turner Diaries.
Replies: >>4649
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>>4634
>>4636
She can't. Her bf reads her all our posts and types her responses for her.
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>>4642
If that was the case, all of the posts would be written in broken English.
Replies: >>4653 >>4656
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>>4638
Sure thing. In the meantime I'm finishing up picrel. It's basically DerrickDaBeast as a grown man living out his fantasies in Sevier County, Tennessee during the '60s. Pretty entertaining read.
Replies: >>4662
Anyone read Kyle Odom's story?
https://archive.org/stream/odom-manifesto/Odom-Manifesto_djvu.txt
Replies: >>4651 >>4652
>>4650
>Magma Cum Loud
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>>4650
Look at the eyes. Ashley is a Martian. I know because she stimulates my penis.
Replies: >>4654
>>4645
Czech yourself before you wreck yourself.
>>4652

Omg she is so cute, she's not walling at all!
Replies: >>4668
oy vey
>>4645
Oh shit, world is a small place, I wouldn't have thought ash would have had one czech fan and now she has two
Replies: >>4660
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It’s endchan’s  euro community
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>>4656
I'm making sure she only has one Czech fan.
Replies: >>4663
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>>4649
Thanks, Anon.
>>4660
Don't let your mouth write a Czech your ass can't cash.
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Czech mate
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He needs a reality Czech. He said the Czech was in the mail but in reality the Czech bounced so we have some Czeching up to do.
Seabee read The Turner Diaries?? I did Nazi that coming.
Replies: >>4667 >>4672
>>4666
Holocaust jokes are in bad taste anne frankly I won't put up with them!
Replies: >>4669 >>4673
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>>4654
The only wall Ashley will be hitting is her bedroom wall when I pin her against it.
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>>4667
Hitlerious!
Replies: >>4674
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For any fans of Cormac McCarthy's novel 'Blood Meridian' I highly recommend reading the memoir that inspired it written by a soldier named Samuel Chamberlain called 'My Confession'. This man ran away from his home in Boston at age 15 during the 1840s and travelled to Texas where he joined the army and fought during the Mexican-American war in San Antonio, along with other military operations in Mexico. He eventually joined the infamous Glanton Gang, a fearsome group of scalp hunters contracted by Mexican authorities to eliminate any hostile Apache and other aboriginal tribes that terrorized those lands. After his military service, he retired and lived a regular life as a farmer where he raised a family before passing away at 78. A true American badass.

https://archive.org/details/in.ernet.dli.2015.226260/mode/2up
Replies: >>9329
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>>4666
Nice play on words, Anon. Couldn't have done better myself.
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>>4667
Another Anon with a play on words. I'm surrounded by talent.
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>>4669
And the hits just keep on coming
All good picks tbh I might pick something up this weekend
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This is the last book I purchased. It's my favorite true crime story.

>AS FRANK AMODEO met with President George W. Bush at the White House to discuss NATO operations in Afghanistan, no one knew that he’d already embezzled nearly $200 million from the federal government—money he intended to use to bank roll his plan to take over the world. From Amodeo’s global headquarters in the shadow of Florida’s Disney World, with a nearly inexhaustible supply of the Internal Revenue Service’s funds, Amodeo acquired multiple businesses and amassed a mega corporate-conglomerate. Driven by his delusions of world conquest, he negotiated the purchase of a squadron of American fighter jets and the controlling interest in a former Soviet ICBM factory. He began building the largest private militia on the planet—over one million Africans strong. Simultaneously, Amodeo hired an international black-ops force to orchestrate a coup in the Congo, while plotting to take over several small eastern European countries.The most disturbing part of it all is, had the U.S. government not thwarted his plans, Amodeo might have just pulled it off.
Replies: >>4680
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>>4678
>purchasing books
>>4668
Don't let the retarded online woman psy op you into not touching grass anon
Get fit, find a mentally stable gf and make healthy children
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>>4684
I don't need advice from a woman.
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>>4684
>>4684
>mentally stable
>female
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Baysed
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>>4711
looks interesting, QRD?
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I suggest this book.
I think we all could benefit from reading it, especially you.

https://www.thriftbooks.com/w/modifying-retarded-behavior_john-t-neisworth/2460571/
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This is a pretty good comic, it's basically an R rated version of the movie Homeward Bound set during a world-wide epidemic where humans have gone mad and started killing eachother, but what happens to their pets? Three canine friends venture their way out of the bloody streets of NYC in hopes of finding salvation somewhere in the now masterless world. Anyone familiar with Garth Ennis' work (Crossed, The Boys, Preacher) will enjoy this.

https://viewcomics.me/comic/rover-red-charlie
Replies: >>5697
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what a lovely book

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I31w7WjsByg
Replies: >>5661
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>>5634
I read it. It's meh. I could write something more disturbing.
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>>4783

beasts of burden is a good animal comic. compelling mystery stories and often emotional without cheap exploitation.
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>>4671
RIP Cormac McCarthy :(
Replies: >>9332 >>9334 >>9351
>>9329
Don't bother mourning too much for him. He will live on forever.
Replies: >>9336
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>>9329
First Kaczynksi, now McCarthy.... I've got a bad feeling bros..............................
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>>9332
>He says that he will never die. He dances in light and in shadow and he is a great favorite. He never sleeps, the judge. He is dancing, dancing. He says that he will never die.
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>>9336
<HeH saas thath heh wiliw neven dieid. HeH dancnad ini lighgil ana ini shadash ana heh isi aa grerg favorirovaf. HeH neven sleels, thht juj. HeH isi dancnad, dancicnad. HeH saas thath heh wiw nevereven died.
Replies: >>9351
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>>9329
the movie was better than the book

>>9340 
you ok buddy?
Replies: >>9358 >>9361
>>9351
Hate to say it but I gotta kind of agree with this. While the book does expand a lot on the core philosophical concepts by turning the characters upside down in the end: Anton actually returns the money as a matter of principal. It's revealed Ed Tom betrayed his unit when he served in WWII. Llewelyn teeters on the brink of cheating on his wife and perhaps going his own way before his death. I like how the movie keeps things just a bit more short and concise. It doesn't put training wheels on the story and still shows the corruption of the world and it's individuals but walks back a lot of the character exposition which keeps the movie a bit more digestible as an action drama. Which is good because despite that I still have a lot of friends who still felt the movie was too dry for them.
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>>9351
I haven't read the novel but seen the movie a few times. The film adaptation for The Road was pretty good despite removing a few grisly parts. The same director is working on filming Blood Meridian which will be heavily toned down in regards to its extreme violence to meet an 18A rating for movie theaters and thus defeating the purpose of the story. Then again, it worked for American Psycho so maybe it will turn out somewhat decent.
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Finished listening to the Pageboy audiobook in Elliot Page's nasally masculine voice. I was expecting plenty of body horror descriptions of her post-surgery but it was mostly childhood trauma, failed relationships and resentment towards her father/step mother. The romantic stories of her "fucking" other actresses, especially the dazzling Kate Mara, may have ruined my favourite corduroy pants. All in all, it was a pretty good listen with plenty of cringe moments that were entertaining ie; encountering "gay bashers" on the street, rushing to the bathroom with full-blown anxiety and shitting immediately after hearing her crush was fucking someone else at a party, peeing out of her vagina while standing, etc. Here's an excerpt from early on in the book.

>This new body offering a grounding, a presence, enjoying things I never thought I would, feeling queerer than ever. How deeply freeing to have someone love fucking my dick and my pussy and permitting myself to enjoy it.

Listening to this book made me want to explore more of her filmography which is also depressing considering she was one of my celebrity crushes while growing up and now looks horrible because she chose to mutilate herself instead getting professional help from psychologists to deal with her gender dysphoria. Punching yourself in the face and hearing voices in your head should earn you a trip to the psych ward instead of an operating room.
>>11734
she looks like she is dressed as a bad John Cena cosplay, cant unsee it

>peeing out of her vagina while standing
wouldnt the pee just go everywhere?
Ive heard some loud af female pee'rs in my years hiding out in women's bathrooms, so I just assume they spray all over the place.


>How deeply freeing to have someone love fucking my dick and my pussy
>my dick
>my pussy

???
Replies: >>11741 >>11747
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>>11734
Good review anon. I didn't know she narrated the audiobook herself, I don't honestly know if I could stomach listening to the FTM voice for that long, so kudos.

Actually what I find myself more interested in are your motivations for reading/listening to it at all. I don't mean that in a mocking way; I'm genuinely curious but I don't know how to ask in a way that doesn't seem judgey. But anyway, you seem intelligent, so what drew you to that particular work? Do you read often, or were you just so captivated by the abnormality or novelty of that book?
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>>11734
Imagining prime Ellen Page talk about it being "freeing to have someone love fucking my pussy" makes me diamonds. Just sad that the only time she talks about this is when she got a tomboy tumor (t clitty). Is the TLDR that her step mom molested her and that's why she's a lesbian?
Replies: >>11741
>>11736
It's basically her own interpretation of how a man should dress, like some kind of caricature in regards to men's fashion. It's similar to how MtF trannies dress like librarians by wearing long sleeved shirts, blazers and long dresses to help hide their narrow hips, broad shoulders and other dead giveaways to the male anatomy.
>>11738
As I've mentioned previously, she was one of my early celebrity crushes and when the news broke out that she transitioned and posted an online photo of her zipper tits and ab implants I was pretty bummed out that she became a victim of this stupid movement that encourages those with mental health issues to go under the knife and try becoming something they're not. I already know she will kill herself in the near future, her eyes alone show regret and despair regardless of what the overly happy talk show hosts and yes men in her circle say about her "brave and inspiring" journey as a trans person. I figured this book will give some insight on what led her to make this life altering choice. 
>>11740
>Is the TLDR that her step mom molested her and that's why she's a lesbian?
Her step mom was basically rough-housing her as a kid and she took every little remark very personally and felt anxiety and depression over everything while her dad brushed it off. She was always confused about her gender and sexuality even as a kid and it wasn't until later into her acting career she decided to come out after feeling pressure from Hollywood, paparazzis, etc. always questioning about it. I personally believe she would've been happier if she didn't become an actor and pursued a career as a environmentalist since she mentions in the book about her passion in saving the planet and all that gay hippy bullshit maaaaaan but she decided to take Hollywood route and got mentally fucked by all the fame and bullshit that came with it and now she has no tits and her acting career is at risk because of it. All we can do now is sit back and watch as she continues digging her grave.
>>11734
Damn I thought the only thing Elliot Page would write is her suicide note.
Replies: >>11745 >>11748
>>11742
Soon™
>>11736
I think she means "bussy". That's probably why she walks with her legs always shoulder width apart because of the Frankenstein cock sewn between them.
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>>11742
sheeeiitt you still got it ash
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Last one GN
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Highly reccomend!!!!11111
>>12459
my dad has this book
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 >>12460 
Yasss tell him to check this one out too<33 Astrology is so misunderstood
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>>12459
>>12461
The Inner Sky (Forrest Steven) (z-lib.org) for beginners is not heavy
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>>12459
YAAAAAS! I READ THIS AND IM ADDICTED TO ANAL PROJECTING
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Most useful book for me personally
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1984 by George Orwell
Omega: The Last Days of the World by Camille Flammarion
Hamlet by William Shakespeare
Sailing Alone Around the World by Joshua Slocum
Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl

Currently reading The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
>>12496
NECK LIFTS BREAK YOUR BACK BUBBA
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>>14954
immagine stressing your spinal cord for any reason
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>>14964
The only part of my body I like to stress regularly is my dick
>>14964
also I have erectile dysfunction
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>>12459
>>12461
Plato's end game is gayer, i've heard it can change your gender if you red it it ancient greek
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>>14973
*read it
sorry for your English x)
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>>15508
lul great find!

video idea: Chester publishes a book like this but its the opposite. 
Its a book encouraging kids to say Yes
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>2024
>actually reading books
Bump for reading season
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>>15508
My dad and all my uncles are straight as arrows
4 niggas, 2 children on average
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>>16345
wrong image soz
>jk2ksi
My Poem dedicated to: Ashley (duh)
Based on a dream by: Yours truly

I dreamt I was a boy again
full of vigor, life and zest
I was back in our old flat
What dreams to have at rest
I dreamt I had been neighbored
with a lovely youthful lass
As my mom took me upstairs
through the lift with doors of glass
My mum rang their door
As her mum answered it quickly
They chatted with each other
as I stood there looking meekly
She introduced her daughter
"My little angel" she addressed her
"This is our neighbor's boy"
She observed as I observed her
"Is she shy or is she coy?"
"Does she like me or not?" I wondered
She looked down and the back up
"She likes me!" I quite pondered.

Our schools are separate
But in dreams there are no laws
You can dance ballet in class
You can go to space with Jaws
And so I saw her through the window
It was Ashley looking majestic
I made faces at her doll face
All this felt fantastic
In the class she walked
All dressed in black
She greeted me warmly
I was petrified in my track
She was warm and quite lovely
But lo and behold
What do I see!
Her teeth had blackened
"Have you been smoking?"
I rather gathered.
She nodded in approval
Or was she nodding in acceptance
I couldn't hold back so I kissed her 
I had cut her mid sentence.
At first I liked it and so did she
But then I was shocked
We both were 
Why did it happen?
Where did it come from?
Is this love or just madness?
What did we witness?

Instead of answers, more questions
Is love a problem or a solution?
Or is it both at the same time
but also not at neither times?
Does she see me like I see her?
Is she blind like how I love her?
Why the torment why the pain?
what's the point of dreams in vain?
Let it end, let it end.
Love is just a dead-end.
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>>17076
A recital of the poem.
>>4631
I have a digital copy of it. I got it from the Archive: https://archive.org/details/the-turner-diaries-andrew-mac-donald-william-pierce
I learnt about the book from the movie "Talk Radio".
Also, what say you where we post our stories? Here or the new thread?
Replies: >>17680 >>17709
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>>17672
Thanks, now I don't have to order the book online and worry about the feds arresting me.
>>17680
LOL. I don’t think downloading from Archive has any issues.
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>>17672
>>17680

After lending my copy of The Turner Diaries to someone and not getting it back I ordered another copy from this totally obscure dark web site that only deals in monero. I had it drop shipped to the address of an abandoned house being used by meth heads. I was notified that the book was delivered. I went to the house and found some meth head reading it. I told him that I was Turner and to relinquish my diaries. The meth head shit a brick after I told him that after we get rid of all the Feds and blacks and Jews and all undesireables that the meth heads would be next. 

I walked out of the house the book safely tucked under my arm and saw two men in sunglasses and black suits writing down my license plate number. I asked if there was a problem and the two men in black just looked at me and returned to their black SUV. 

I can only speculate that the web site I ordered the book from was a Fed honeypot. I have the feeling I'm being watched but I don't care, at least I have a copy of The Turner Diaries.

Of course the above is fiction. I did reorder another copy to replace the one I lent to someone and never returned. It took a little digging to find a site that had the book for sale. Pissed me off that I paid 4 times what the book originally cost me some years ago..
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>>17709
Wow, nice larping with the Turner claim, SeaBee. LOL. Well, it is claimed that the Turner Diaries led to the Oklahoma City bombing but I think that was mainly due to the Ruby Ridge fiasco. But being watched over by the Feds is just pure creepy. I'd rather be watched over by neo-Nazis looking for recruits than the Feds over a fictional book about a liberal dystopia.
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>>17680
retard
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>>17680
VPN solves that issue instantly. I have terabytes of free music, books, and games.
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>>17710
Yea, I've read about some Fed occurrences also, like Ruby Ridge (truly a sad occurrence), the Oklahoma bombing, the Branch Dividians and the killing of Bill Cooper author of Behold A Pale Horse. Interesting reading all.
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>>17711
it was a joke sweaty
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i am 1 @ D
1
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too many books for me tbf
go outside
touch grass negro
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This book is literally me.
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Flatland has a quite unique take on women: they are mere line seqments (whereas men are more complex shapes), very dumb and required by law to constantly wiggle their butts and make noise because their needle like shape is quite dangerous and makes them hard to see. But it's just an overall awesome book, can be freely downloaded at Gutenberg.
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Currently reading this. I'm about 6 chapters in, and it's fascinating. This is a book published in the 90s about one of the first FBI profilers and how they started using psychology to catch serial killers and other level 99 criminals

My thoughts so far is that this guy is pretty smart for a fed (It's written in the first person from the guy, John Douglas' perspective). Considering there's another guy credited as the author, I'm just guessing that he's the "real writer" cleaning up the prose, which is why Douglas sounds like a professional author despite serving in the FBI all those years.

In the book, he detours from all the gritty stuff early on to go into his personal life in detail. He's basically the embodiment of the chad meme: football star, flunked out of college, joined the air force, got married, then finally got recruited to the fbi, still in his 20s, and then he ended up going back to school to get a masters(!) in behavorial science. I sense a bit of virtue signaling in the way he describes himself and his commitment to his job, and I think there's one part that really illustrates that.

He's depicted as this sensitive, almost intellectual guy while also being the perfect god-chad football star and husband, but there's a part early on where he mentions an anecdote about how him and his wife wanted to talk to a priest before getting married because he was protestant and she was Catholic. In this part, Douglas recounts how the priest asked how they initially meant, and to fuck with him, he tells the priest that they met at a titty bar and his wife could spin the nipple tassles in opposite directions until one fell off in his general direction, so he asked her out. This is obviously not true, but I found this part interesting for two reasons: The joke seemed pretty crass for the sensitive, almost bookish guy he's been depicted as thus far. I think this was a moment we got to see the "real" glowkpop fan side of him, unintentionally. I bet he's a lot more like that IRL.

Anyway, I guess my point is the FBI aren't these all-knowing, all-seeing guys like they want you to believe. They're basically supercops, and police are retarded. Still, this Douglas guy seems pretty smart compared to other cops, I've only checked out a couple of interviews with him, and maybe he is a decent guy, but whatever. The book is interesting, check it out

P.S. Ashley, why are epubs not allowed? I was going to post the ebook here
Replies: >>28651
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>>28644
I've only seen the Mindhunter TV show which was decent. If you're into crime/thrillers I highly recommend the Hannibal Lecter novels (skip Hannibal Rising, it's trash). 

For research material, the author attended classes at Quantico and spoke to agents of the Behavioral Science Unit so his narration on forensics and criminal psychology is both interesting and accurate. All three books are excellent, but Hannibal is my personal favourite mainly because of how disturbing and twisted it is. Unfortunately, it also had the worst film adaptation out of the three novels since some of the major key plot points (the ending especially) and characters were missing.
Replies: >>28684
>>28651
I loved that movie. https://www.yewtu.be/watch?v=lErnYQKfzp0
>>24423
>Ameri can psycho Bret Easton Ellis
why does Ameri want to psycho Bret Easton Ellis?

anyways how do you guys feel about audio books?
Ive never listened to any because I think that I might zone out too easily and miss bits and have to rewind.
besides I like the feeling of a book in my hand
also i like the smell of books
Replies: >>28692 >>28766
>>28691
I find that both are enjoyable. Who doesn't like being read to? Audio books are like radio serials. In my opinion, that's the next logical step for audio books is for them to become acted radio serials if that's not already being done. That's an aspect of AI I'm interested in. I'd like to train AI models on voices I'm familiar with so that they can read to me. I'd much rather have Ashley read me a story than say Morgan Freeman. I use audio books two ways. I will use an audio book I've already listened to as ambience and I will use an audio book to motivate me to actually read the book by listening to a chapter and then actually reading it or vice versa. I zone out as well reading books and listening to long winded speeches but it's tolerable if you only do one chapter at a time.
>>28691
I listen to audiobooks all the time at work, there's a YouTube channel that has AI generated voices of celebrities reading books, it's not perfect but it's still quite enjoyable. Christian Bale reading 'American Psycho' as Patrick Bateman was pretty funny. 'The Shining' narrated by Jack Nicholson and 'Fight Club' by Edward Norton are decent also. 

https://www.yewtu.be/watch?v=weu-9woaYQM

In general, the best audiobooks are usually the ones narrated by the author themselves since they know how to portray their characters, 'The Exorcist' is a good example. Audiobooks that are abridged are garbage and defeats the purpose of storytelling when a good chunk of the material is removed just for the sake of time. I got halfway through Hannibal, which was narrated by the author, before realizing that a lot of parts were missing and I had to listen to it again from the beginning with another narrator who was unfortunately British but alteast I got to hear the full story as it was written.

Some novels can be difficult to read because of the writing style. Reading 'Blood Meridian' by Cormac McCarthy was challenging at first but I eventually got used to it. The audiobook narrated by Richard Poe is excellent.

https://www.yewtu.be/watch?v=d7AfOQQdAUo
https://www.yewtu.be/watch?v=q0Y7cHA2FSQ
Hey guys, I just want to stop by to say thanks for posting, especially about mind hunter. I want to learn to empathize with strange minds so that I can write better characters without making it all a slog. High culture has to be fun, and have the potential for individualized experience.
I am reading this web serial. It is one of the first times I've so thoroughly, consciously enjoyed a "character-driven" fiction. A character so deeply and comically neurotic, but so easy to empathize with because the root of his obsession is the desire to be someone truly great. Sometimes he seems like the most pathetic fucking thing, sometimes I just plain love the character, sometimes at the same time. I believe that having multiple simultaneous emotional reactions to a story/character indicate something very very special.

Increasingly the actual story is just about his actions in a fantasy world, and while the world and story are cleverly unique. Still a cut above most web fiction, and I enjoyed flashback chapters that characterized the authentically foolish main character way more.

You might worry about the whole story being a dull "woah capitalism corporations bad and ruin everything" rehash from the name and the setting, but the author hasn't fixated on anything trite.

https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/90222/crippling-debt-isekai-fantasy-slow-burn-progression

I considering making an account on royalroad (you can't review from tor/vpn) just to post a review on site.
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