/ashleyj/ - Ashley Jones

>>21052 (OP) 
no

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Yay, I'll go first. No one can beat he power of PI. Did I win?

please send this thread to the void

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>>21054
Your move, buckaroo

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Someone play with me

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>>21083

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>>21099

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>>21101

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>>21092
Let's rock

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>>21102

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>>21106

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>>21105
and roll!

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>>21116
Good luck not really

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>>21118
No retreat, no surrender!

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>>21111
It’s a stalemate

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>>21118
Since your such a lil bitch who couldnt compete with my intellectual prowess and run the fuck away, I had no other choice butt 2 stimulate the most likely outcome between the 2 of us and you know what came up?
Spoiler: ur gay kys faggot

 Spoiler alert 2:Electric Boogaloo: I won. Just like I always do 

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>>21052 (OP) 

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mkay new game

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anyone up for chess?

>>32016
This is awesome. You should add the letters/numbers to the rows/columns (which I just learned is called algebraic notation) to the board. Also post transparent images of the pieces so we can "move" our own.

For now, E2 to E4. I'm not going to play as the kpop fans, obviously.

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>>32017
OK I added the numbers and letters for you guys who are not chess grandmasters, I also made the image edit friendly and converted it to 256 colors so now it takes under 100 kB so we don't nuke the server. I played g6.
Also let's set straight the rules: anyone can play the next move (either say the move or edit the image or both), but NO COMPUTER ASSISTANCE is allowed OK? No fucking stockfish, we can see if you're an engine.

>>32021
C2 to C3

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>>32022
Bg7, I go sleep now, curious where this will go.

>>32024
F1 to E2

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>>32032

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>>32033
burger to e5
Also if you want you can edit the picture however you like, for example you can change the pieces to some other pictures or upgrade them somehow, can be fun.

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>>32016
Genuine idea on the black vs white. I'll join you guys in playing, but brb gotta put in my vibrating buttplug so I can win

I was playing online chess with random players and kept getting blacked to the point where I wanted to punch my monitor. The only time I won a game was when the other player went AFK until the timer hit zero or they quit abruptly after the beginning of a match.

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>>32041
G2 to G4

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>>32099
burger d6

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>>32102
B2 to B4

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>>32173
horse to f6, the pugs got scared

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>>32174
Chester creeps to B5. Check. The spook is spooked!

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>>32187
yo nigga not so fast, Nc6
the King is safe but forever turned white from the shock

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>>32190
N was too high and forgot to load the gun with bullets. Chester chooses fight mode and claims C6. Check. "Neverland Ranch here I come, aha!"

>>32195
>"Neverland Ranch here I come, aha!"
kek

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>>32195
enjoy your chesterburger, Michael is now preparing for a moonwalk castle to the safety of Neverland Ranch, after that get ready to get checkmated by a dildo Duke
It now feels more like D&D than chess lol

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>>32203
Ashley to A4

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>>32214
bishop takes g4 pug

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>>32215
After years of being malnourished due to her vegan diet, Ashley finally snaps and gorges on the Chesterburger at C6. Her tummy now full, but her new craving for human flesh has her blood-thirsty eyes set upon the King of Pop. Check.

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>>32217
lol, this is going to be an amazing gif in the end
> Ashley's body was so deprived of calories she got real fat from the snack, but may be able to lose the weight if she keeps moving around the board.
nigga to d7

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>>32219
Ashley moves her fatass to B7 and rests between two juicy burgers

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>>32229
O-O, made some minor changes to the piece set

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>>32230
pug to D3

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>>32237
N(igga)g4, her honorary preparing to give Duke some ass slapping, maybe he'll enjoy it

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>>32242
horse to F3

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>>32245
that's a good move sir, I play the judge queen to f6, leaving Garfield unprotected but also making eye contact with the horse

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>>32247
Duke to D2. Ashley becomes anorexic since the burgers were replaced with Garfields.

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>>32249
queen takes f3, all hell breaks loose

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>>32253
Duke to C2...

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>>32257
queen takes the rook

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>>32259
Horsey to D2

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>>32267
dildo goes to c8 to protect the garfield

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>>32272
Chester to B2

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>>32334
queen takes Harry the pug, think it's practically over now

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>>32338
Pug to F4, it's not over yet

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>>32348
bishop a4 check, looks like mate in 4 maybe? Kc1 Qg1+ Nf1 Qxf1+ Kd2 Qf2+ Kc1 Qc2# or something

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>>32352
Duke to B1. Just fuck my shit up, baby.

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>>32354
alright, thanks for playing on, after all it's a historical moment :D queen rapes the horse

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>>32359
Ashley to C8. Even though she dislikes penises since they remind her of Uncle Rico, Ashley's severe hunger pain causes her to hallucinate and see the two throbbing cocks as jumbo-sized hotdog wieners. Ashley gobbles the one closest to Michael Jackson while making eye contact, something she rarely does, as he watches in horror. Check.

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>>32386
Admirable act of self sacrifice to give Duke a few extra moments of life, almost as touching as Ron Weasley's famous move in the Harry Potter chess game, but monstrous dildo double penetration was evemtually too much even for Ashley. Dildo takes Ashley at c8.

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>>32390
Pug to A3...

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>>32392
queen c2 check

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>>32393
Duke to A2

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>>32487
bishop b3 checkmate, very good game, thank you for playing
here's the whole game: 1. e4 g6 2. c3 Bg7 3. Be2 e5 4. g4 d6 5. b4 Nf6 6. Bb5+ Nc6 7. Bxc6+ bxc6 8. Qa4 Bxg4 9. Qxc6+ Bd7 10. Qb7 O-O 11. d3 Ng4 12. Nf3 Qf6 13. Kd2 Qxf3 14. Kc2 Qxh1 15. Nd2 Rfc8 16. Bb2 Qxh2 17. f4 Ba4+ 18. Kb1 Qxd2 19. Qxc8+ Rxc8 20. a3 Qc2+ 21. Ka2 Bb3#
and a gif with added evaluation bar

>>32500
I've been observing the game as you guys played, this is an awesome conclusion. The gif is really neat

>>32500
Well done, I knew I fucked up keeping the queen there and I didnt know castling was an actual move so I learned something out of this. Good game.

>>32503
If you didn't even know castling I am surprised how well you played actually, you can get very good I think just by learning some habits like first developing pieces before attacking and so on. Also look up en passant, that's the real meme move lol, it's funny that beginners often think the opponent is hacking when en passant is played.

Tubbies, how well can you draw the world map from memory? DO NOT LOOK AT ANY MAP NOW, not even picrel, if you are to participate in the challenge. You are only allowed to use your brain only, you cannot even look up a list of countries or spellcheck your writing, just put on the paper what's in your head. Picrel is mine, I've always been very bad at geography so you can spot a number of fuck ups such as misnaming an entire ocean, and it's more than clear that I am not an American (:D), but overall I'm very happy about my result. Please only look at my picture once you post yours.

>>36670
Oh shiet good idea. im gonna try this later

>>36670
I think drawing a vagina instead of a world map would be more challenging.

>>36670
looks impressive to me but Im retarded and geometry has always been something that I've always been bad at

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dudettes come play some OpenArena with me, server is :F DEATHMATCH

>>37131
it was fun :D

>>37131
That's cool, I didn't know there was a F2P Unreal Tournament 3 online. We should have a /ashleyj/ gaming tournament. Any other free games we can all play together?

>>37134
Zandronum (doom), Minetest (minecraft clone), and TES3MP (morrowind multiplayer) are some open source ones.

>>37135
cheers, now I have something to play on my Obama PC.

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>>37133
thanks, we can do it again sometime :)
>>37134
>>37135
Watch out, some games aren't completely free as in freedom, look for what is called libre games (there's libregamewiki), these are games that are completely free (as in freedom), not just engine-wise but also in "content". Some quality multiplayer libre games include Xonotic, OpenArena, 0 A.D., Freedoom, Mindustry, SuperTuxKart, HedgeWars, Minetest (AKA Luanti), Teeworlds, Widelands and Lix, but you'll find more. Having some servers hosted by Ashley would be nice, but it's also a lot of additional work, we can play elsewhere (I can temporarily host servers too).

>>37139
I must confess that I hold a more pragmatic view when it comes to software freedom. I know the content/assets of these games are not "libre" but they can still be examined and modified with ease. The structure of their data is completely understood, even if this was achieved through reverse engineering. I can still do whatever I personally want with them without much trouble. Obviously there are still legal restrictions on what you can do with the data which is unfortunate; in an ideal world everything would just be public domain. For me, the most important aspect of software freedom is the ability to fully understand the software and know exactly what you are running on your system. Open source engines for existing video games satisfy this for me.

I hadn't seen libregamewiki before though, so thanks for mentioning that. Seems to be quite a lot of games listed here, I'll have to check some of them out.

>>37143
TBH these are excuses for your gaming addiction, assembly can be examined and understood and modified too, so you can happily run whatever software you want. It's fine if it works for you, just admit you're a gaming coomer and don't rationalize it else you're just like mini jimmy with his mental gymnastics about how smart phones are actually good.

>>37149
Yeah, you got me. I like video games too much to restrict myself to such a small subset of them. I am indeed a gaming coomer.

What you say about assembly is technically true but you know there is a massive difference between reading source code and raw or decompiled assembly that has sometimes been heavily optimized by a compiler. Modifying a binary by patching it's .text section or hooking functions is also more annoying and limited than being able to just modify the source code and recompile. It's about feasibility - good luck reverse engineering an entire game engine in a reasonable amount of time, let alone an operating system.

I'm sure you would agree with me that freedom isn't the only problem with software today, but also complexity. Despite this, you probably still use a modern browser engine: the epitome of software complexity. Sure, you may need to for paying bills and going to government sites, fine. But I'm sure you also use it for other superfluous things, like posting to this board (I tried making this post with NetSurf). In doing so, you show you don't value software simplicity to the same extent you do software freedom. That's understandable; I don't either, as I feel freedom is a prerequisite to even starting to worry about complexity. Still though, you are using horrendously complex software beyond when it is necessary for you to do so. How do you justify this? Do you tell yourself that it's because there's no alternative? There is an alternative: not using the software beyond when you absolutely need to, you internet-addicted coomer! Who knows, it might even be possible for you to live without using the disgusting overgrowth that is the modern browser engine whatsoever.. but then you wouldn't be able to go on this board. What I'm trying to say is: we all just do what "works for us". Sorry if this comes off as a personal attack, that's not what I am going for here. I say this in good faith.

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>>37151
I largely agree with you now and kudos for a thoughtful answer. I also commit sins against software freedom like you point out, so nothing against you, just think it's important to call things their right names, like when you admit you smoke because you can't stop and not because it's healthy. Complexity is a great point, to me it's part of freedom as a whole, whereas licenses are only legal freedom, I want BOTH in my software as much as possible, which is not always possible but we should try, and many libre games get quite close here. It is funny how many programs whose source is available are more difficult to understand and modify than simple programs in assembly (such as old console games maybe), take for example Android, I dare you to try to compile it (you practically need a supercomputer to do so), or just make any kind of meaningful change in the kernel. So yeah, it's complicated, but back to the topic: for us here I would prefer libre games if only for the convenience, there's no need to pirate anything or be afraid of hosting public servers for legal reasons, you just grab em and start the server, it's nice and simple, and it's a nice fuck you message to normie games as bonus.

>>37152
Agreed.

anyway, come play OpenArena now :D

What about Libre movies? Nacho Libre is pretty fun. I'm sure Ashley would love it because it's about a Mexican wrestler played by a Jew who just happens to be her type and it was made by the same creative team that was behind Napoleon Dynamite.

>>37155
What's with you europoors always wanting to play Quake III?

>>37157
we're europros at it

>>37157
Yeah, you guys should instead play Call of Duty Black Ops 37.

>>37154
>So it's not about playing a game to have fun but sending a fuck you message to people who don't care and are never going to get it?
ye that may be right, as I'm getting older this is becoming more and more the most important part of my gaming experience